As a young millennial at the tail end of my twenties, I receive what often feels like a never-ending stream of wedding invitations. I'm excited to attend some more than others, but I've also found myself included in the wedding parties of more than a few. Last year, I was the best man at Luke's wedding, and soon I'll be a groomsman for Dane's. (Though I'm still half convinced I'm only included thanks to the insistence of their fiances. Someone needs to know how to tie a bow tie for the other men!) I also hope to be included in the weddings of my other friends, such as Carson, Drago, and Will, to name a few.While my presence at so many weddings doesn't seem unusual at first, it wasn't until I started talking with some of my other friendsmore specifically, gay friendsthat I began to reconsider. I quickly realized many of those gay friends had very few, if any, straight male friends of their own. Plenty of other gays and, of course, women, but straight men were nowhere to be seen in these queer circles. And when I was dancing (poorly) at weddings, I was often the only gay man in sight. Thanks to my longstanding friendships with so many straight men, I had become something of an anomaly.I asked one of my gay friends about his experience with straight men, and he felt there were "invisible social boundaries" which often prevented such friendships from emerging, let alone enduring. I had to agree with him. He is one of the most intelligent and cultured men I know. But it also made me wonder how my friendships survived these invisible social boundaries. What was it that set my friendships apart, and what could be gleaned from having strong relationships that broke the boundaries between gay and straight men?I tried to do some digging online, but found that the benefits of gay-straight friendships haven't truly been addressed. If anything, their dynamics have been looked at as nothing more than a curiosity or a potential punching bag. Look no further than "Straight Male Friend" from Saturday Night Live in which Bowen Yang proudly boasts, "Straight male friend is a low effort, low stakes relationship that requires no emotional commitment."Despite the jokes, in recent years, the loneliness epidemic, or at least the perception of such, has been a persistent issue amongst Americans. And if data on loneliness is to be relied upon, it's overwhelmingly affecting men. Harvard's Graduate School of Education surveyed 1,500 individuals in 2024 and found that 21% reported feeling lonely. According to some reports, two-thirds of men between the ages of 18 and 23 say, "No one really knows me." Furthermore, one in five unmarried men and one in every four men under 39 report having no close friends at all.Indeed, establishing a friendship is often easier said than done, but it's far from impossible in our ever-connected world. Even so, one obstacle is communication. Texting men can be a challenge, and men have long been stereotyped as poor communicators. But how can you solve such an issue? A straightforward solution could be pairing bad texters with texting enthusiasts. They say opposites attract, and this can still apply beyond the romantic sense. In my experience, gay men tend to be glued to their phones and don't often take issue with texting others, whether it's to get them to socialize or just to send some memes about Chappell Roan. When I talk with a gay friend, it's not uncommon to be bombarded with a string of twenty or more messages about the Oscars, and I happily send my own string back.One text at a time, the barriers can start to be chipped away once someone shows they can be themselves and find a non-judgmental space for engagement.Maintaining communication can be essential to fostering and sustaining these friendships, though it's not always a necessity. That is a lesson I learned from my straight friends. It's okay to spend time apart without having to live in fear that the last meetup or the most recent text soured the dynamic. Sometimes this can even serve to benefit the friendship and make you all the more excited to see them again. In my experience, men can be willing to text to coordinate times to meet up and spend hours discussing a wide range of subjectsdeath, politics, and Star Wars, among others. Crucially, many of these topics are ones I almost exclusively talk about with my straight friends.I've often thought that straight men want to engage in deeper conversations, but may not feel they have the right outlets to do so in a healthy way. This can lead to men talking at people instead of with them. I can assure you, a gay man will let a straight man know when to shut up. Or, perhaps more importantly, learn how to discuss new topics and listen to one another.Luke's bachelor party last year showcased the perfect confluence of these different cultures of communication. Yes, I was the only gay man in the group, but that didn't stop us all from engaging in a Hot Ones-style wings contest tied into a gay-themed drinking game. I'll never forget some of these straight guys' reactions after being asked probing and sexually charged questions while having to down an IPA and devour chicken wings doused in 'Da Bomb.'Hot wings aside, differing perspectives and experiences between straight and gay men can also help to improve our partnership potential. From a biological perspective, we have decades of research at our disposal for why homosexuality might occur. One of the reasons hypothesized is that same-sex attraction can reduce aggression and conflict due to a statistical reduction in partner competition.Think about it in more practical terms. I've taken my straight friends to bars and helped them as a "wingman." As a gay man, it may have even been easier to earn their trust as someone they can confide in without any sense of competition. While some men harbor homophobic beliefs or feel emasculated surrounding themselves with gay men, this cultural perspective needs to shift. Why couldn't a straight man with multiple gay friends be viewed as better positioned for relationship success?Not only could gay men talk about partners and relationships with their straight friends, but they can also offer some insight into how women or other sexual partners may want or be looking for. Through my friendships, I've been introduced to a variety of new shows, artists, and histories, and learned about some of the anxieties, stresses, and aspirations straight men encounter. This insight has been particularly beneficial to me in recent months, as I have explored our current political climate and why men in my demographic may be shifting to the right.With increasing loneliness amongst men and increasing radicalization based on 2024 election data, now may be the most opportune time for men to seek out new and different friendships. Gay men can reach out and communicate with straight peers, introducing them to Paloma Diamond or polyamory. And straight men, as they have done for me, can teach us about Jeremy Clarkson or paintball.The LGBTQ+ community is currently facing greater threats under the current administration. But having just one gay friend can significantly influence, and perhaps even open a person's mind, on issues they may not have thought about previously. To address polarization, we need to build bridges and be mindful of these barriers amongst ourselves and our communities, whether we identify as gay, straight, or anywhere else along the spectrum.Gay men can and should extend friendships to straight colleagues and make lifelong connections and relationships with them. I have happily done it and know others can too. But gay men can't be the only ones to extend a hand. Straight men will still need to think critically about their own friendships and be willing to step out of their comfort zones. But what else are friends for if not to help one another during difficult or uncomfortable times?If these friendships are to emerge, both gay and straight men need to respond to and begin to dismantle the invisible social barriers. Friendships between men can impact numerous aspects of life, from mental health to politics and culture, but only if we're willing to reach out and form new connections.Which reminds me, I still need to figure out a green suit for Dane's upcoming wedding. I'm just not sure if it should be camo green or brat green.Voices is dedicated to featuring a wide range of inspiring personal stories and impactful opinions from the LGBTQ+ community and its allies. Visit Out.com/submit to learn more about submission guidelines. Views expressed in Voices stories are those of the guest writers, columnists, and editors, and do not directly represent the views of Out or our parent company, equalpride.