Lesbian comedian Ellen DeGeneres says the allegations of her toxic workplace culture that occurred just before she canceled her long-running talk show devastated her and that she wants to remain beloved amongst her viewers and fans. Im here because I love doing stand-up, and I miss doing stand-up, and I like making people happy, and I do care what people think, DeGeneres said at the beginning of her recently released Netflix stand-up comedy special,Ellen DeGeneres: For Your Approval. Related Ellen says she should have signed off her show by saying Go f**k yourselves She says she was kicked out of show business in her newest Netflix special. When youre a public figure, youre open to everyones interpretation, she continued. And Im sure youve heard the saying that, What other people think of me is none of my business. Because people will say all kinds of things and you have no control over that. But you know the truth and thats all that matters. Never Miss a Beat Subscribe to our newsletter to stay ahead of the latest LGBTQ+ political news and insights. Subscribe to our Newsletter today After a nearly 20-year run with over 3,200 episodes and 60 Daytime Emmy Awards, DeGeneres aired the final episode of her daytime talk show,Ellen, on May 26, 2022. Throughout its run, the Queen of Kind ran warm interviews with celebrities and with everyday people trying to do good in the world. Shed often challenge them with lighthearted games or surprise them with generous gifts meant to aid their work.But in 2020, the comedienne came under fire from former employees who accused her ofrudenessandnot communicating with themduring the height of the COVID pandemic. Some said theyd lost their jobsfor taking medical leaveand were targeted forsexual harassment by powerful and unaccountable producers.Several producers resigned from the show afterBuzzfeedpublished the allegations.While DeGeneres took responsibility and apologized to her employees, less than a year later, she announced her intention to end the show, stating that itwasnot a challenge anymore. She has since said that she will retire from show business after the airing of her Netflix special. I got kicked out of show business. Yeah, because Im mean, DeGeneres said in the special. You cant be mean and be in show business. Theyll kick you out. No mean people in show business. Referencing the May 1998 cancellation of her TV sitcom, Ellen, shortly after she came out as lesbian, DeGeneres said, Kicked me out before because I told them I was out. No gay people in show business. They kick you out. Cant be gay and be in show business. Eventually, theyre going to kick me out a third time for being old mean, old and gay, the triple crown.[I] spent an entire lifetime trying to make people happy, she added, Ive cared far too much what other people think of me. So, the thought of anyone thinking that Im mean was devastating to me, and it consumed me for a long time.After a lifetime of caring, I just cant anymore. So I dont. But if Im being honestAnd I have a choice of people remembering me as someone who was mean or someone who was beloved. Be-lov-ed? Beloved? Beloved. Someone who is beloved? I choose that.Subscribe to theLGBTQ Nation newsletterand be the first to know about the latest headlines shaping LGBTQ+ communities worldwide.